It's Over for Now..

I have been struggling to write about our trip since we got home. You can say I have truly been in a period of morning.

I always get excited about going to Nicaragua but this trip I knew in my heart it would change the way I see and feel about this country.

We met on Monday with the new lawyer and he went to Mi Familia on our behalf. Not much came from the first meeting only a second one.

The lawyer pushed Mi Familia for answers and at the end the outcome was not favorable for us.

The girls have been put into this Love Program because there is a family member asking for Isamar. Since the bond between them is so strong they will not separate the girls, automatically giving the dad both girls.

We were told the decision has been made and there is no changing it. We can either adopt another child or take our paperwork back.

As harsh as that sounds that's how it is. It did not matter to them that we have had a 4 year relationship, it did not matter to them that Carmen is not this man's child. It did not matter that the girls love us and want to be with us and not him. Nothing matters. Only that the rules of the program are upheld.

I wished I could tell you that hearing "I'm sorry" matters, but right now it doesn't. My heart is broken and in a million pieces. I feel like I left Nicaragua and betrayed my girls even though I know I have done all I can do.

Additionally, we asked for another child from the House of Rose and was denied that also. No child can be asked for specifically by anyone. All the children in orphanages today will be evaluated and if there is a family member anywhere who will take them they will be given to that person. If no member is found they will be put on the adoption list for those awaiting a child.

At this point in this process we can only wait and call upon the Lord. Terry and I know these girls are ours and at some point they will be. We are not sure what God's plan is right now but both of us are certain we know they are to be with us one day. For now, we wait and pray for these decisions to be changed.

Nicaragua is known for making rules and changing them often. We ask that you pray that those making these decisions will be overturned.

The idea sounds like a good one at first but if you talk it through it is an impossible task for the government to uphold. This country is poor, if they had money to pay families to take kids they would be using it to feed the millions of starving families.

We ask that you pray with us in agreement for the following:

1. The girls will somehow know that we did not abandon them.
2. The girls will be protected when they leave. No harm will come against them.
3. The government will see that the rules they have put in place needs to be altered on a case by case basis.
4. Mi Familia will listen to the girls and their desires.
5. The dad will see the desires of the girls to be with us. Once he get them he can give them back to us.
6. Pray for the many families this affects. We are only one of many families who lost their chances for the children they felt God was leading them to have.
7. We are being told there are people within the government that oppose this program, pray they find a way to overturn it.

For now we wait and pray and try to stay strong. It's heartbreaking to say the least but we are confident that God is in control and we are trusting him to intervene.

I was ask this weekend if we are sure this is God's plan and I can tell you that if I have ever know His plan for sure, those girls are to be in our home. This is a fight against the enemy. The enemy is slowing this adoption down, not God.

Thanks for your moral support and prayers as we go through this process.

Angie & Terry